Wake up kids, we’ve got the dreamer’s disease

Is dreaming a disease? “Wake up kids, we’ve got the dreamer’s disease,” the first line of the song You Get What You Give by New Radicals, got me thinking about the dreams I had for the future.

Recently, I found two other friends having similar thoughts. We are those type-A people who had our lives planned, knew what we wanted to accomplish, and how it was going to get done. The three of us came up for air from working our plan and wondered how we ended up where we are. Undoubtedly some things got sidetracked along the way. But we handled it, made some modifications and kept going with our plans. But in looking up from our diligent work, we saw other people had the lives we thought we would have at this point. Where did things go wrong? To be sure, our lives are good. We all have great jobs, good health and are financially secure. But somehow it isn’t enough.

The dreamer’s disease.

We should be thankful and say we’ve accomplished this list of stuff. But somehow something seems off. Is it our Type A-ness that is not satisfied with a result that isn’t exactly what we planned? Should we just learn to be okay with things out of our control and be thankful for all the turns in the path? That’s hard for me to do. I’ve always wanted to get a PhD while not working a full-time job. I made it – that’s what I’m doing - but it just isn’t quite as good as I had hoped. I have no real complaints, it’s just not as great as I thought it would be. The dreamer’s disease strikes again.

Can dreams be the root of disappointment? Sometimes they are. Disappointment is finding reality didn’t strike the dream’s bullseye or the achieve what we imagined. Should I scold myself for feeling disappointed when the dream has been reached or is in view? Or, in typical type-A fashion, analyze the situation, figure out what could be better wrong and improve it? I don’t know the answer.

If I could talk to my younger self, I would say part of the dream should be that things will happen, life will turn, and there’s so much to enjoy and learn in that. Dream about enjoying the things you can’t plan or work towards. Maybe that would have changed the trajectory of my attitude today. The Type-A dreamer needs to live in grace. Grace to myself. Grace from me to others. Grace toward me from others. I’d also tell my younger self, just chill and know my way is not the right way. Rather, God will put things along the path to learn from and carry me to the next dream, knowing dreams are like clouds. They change and move, and everything is actually right in the world.