November 2020
This piece is dedicated to The Sport Management Society and the amazing people that help make it what it is today. Thank you for every moment of my journey and giving me the opportunity to be my complete self. Thank you for believing in me. –Aaron
October 2018 was the worst month of my life. I look back and I still remember the collision of my personal life, work life, and academic life spreading my broken spirit so thin that it seemed that I was in an impossible situation with no way out. The quicksand, the whitewater rapids, the resistant force that is depression and anxiety began to make it hard to find a will to keep fighting. No matter how exhausted I was, I could not go to sleep. Regardless of how hungry I was, there were so many days I could not eat. The imposter syndrome derived from being a first-generation college student from a low-income, single-mother home that had to fight through the Blinn TEAM Program just to feel like I belonged. It seemed like there was no escape.
Exiting an extremely toxic relationship seems like a positive – which it is – but at that moment in time, realizing that I had spent a great portion of my life pouring my energy into someone that only provided toxic habits and traits in return was shameful. The time and energy that could have been economically organized to my family, friends, and the people in my life that loved me reminded me of the true opportunity cost of my situation. Cohabiting with someone who actively impedes on your life and mental health is detrimental – it makes you not want to go home, the place that is supposed to be your sacred escape from any problems.
After having the chance to put together the marketing campaigns for the 2017 Sport Management Career Fair and the inaugural Able, Active, and Adaptive Disability Conference, I was hired as a student worker within the TAMU Sport Management program to execute the social media campaign. What I was not prepared for was the toxic work environment that my supervisor at the time would unload onto me by being manipulative and taking advantage of my “catch-22” habit of saying yes to every opportunity. As a student worker, I was only being paid for 10 hours a week to run the accounts yet I was working 30+ hours as I helped put together a lesson plan for a Sport Communication course that I was not a instructor or teaching assistant for, on top of being forced into a position to lead several events, and being scolded for not being able to fulfill so many unrealistic expectations. The philosophical differences between my supervisor and myself was that they saw individuals as expendable – as exhaustible – but to me, every single person offers something new to a culture, offers new skills to a workplace, and offers a collection of unique experiences that no one can bring to the table.
Of course, with the aforementioned dilemmas in place, my education – my main priority – began to suffer. My professors were able to quickly figure that something was wrong with me. Why would Aaron not be actively participating in class? As Dr. Andrew Pittman would know, I always have something to add to the discussion in class. It was clear that my passion for being an active student in the classroom was put into question, and it was no longer – quite simply put – fun. At this point in time, I had made the decision to pursue graduate school and become Dr. Aaron Anderson, professor of sport management, but my enthusiasm for pursuing this was muddled with hating my overextended work and not being able to enjoy going home at the end of the day. Dr. Scott Waltemyer’s office seemed like it was my only escape from everything going wrong at home, at work, and in school.
In the same chord of dissonance, that same fall semester, it was quite evident that The Sport Management Society was on the brink of collapse. I was seldom part of the organization during my undergraduate career here at Texas A&M because it lacked soul and seemed like many of the people involved in positions of authority were self-interested rather than focused on serving the members. This may actually be the first honest, transparent documentation of what the organization was really like. If you were to ask what SMS used to be like, you would often hear the following characteristics: unorganized, impersonal, lazy, or lack of quality, among so many other negative traits.
The few members that still believed in the organization’s potential will remember that one fateful night that was likely the lowest point of the organization. It was a cold night and – at the time – the organization would meet on the third floor of Blocker, an inherently inconvenient place for meetings to occur relative to so many other organizations. Imagine taking the time and energy to go out of your way on campus and come to a meeting where: 1) Two of the seven-member officer team show up; 2) There are no new opportunities or social activities provided; 3) The presentation lasts only five minutes; and 4) There are no opportunities for members to socialize in substitution of meaningful presentation time. I believe that that night essentially sealed the fate of the organization to ultimately disband, much like another TAMU student organization: the Sport Marketing Association.
There was a clear disinterest shared among the few remaining people that were active in the organization at that very moment. The organization was officially a joke to its members and that specific meeting was the punchline. After that night, maybe 15 members stayed involved with the organization and justifiably so – why would anyone want to stay involved with anything that they paid to be part of if there are no inherent benefits? For many, this was the breaking point that lost so many people and the SMS brand equity was lost within the sport management student body and among the faculty members. For others, this was a call to action – a call for some substantial change given the obvious potential for this organization to be successful. Cue the officer applications.
For the first time in many years, I was seeking to work in a position of leadership alongside some other individuals who were interested in seeking change for SMS – who saw the true potential of the organization. Though my philosophy of leadership – specifically, servant leadership – invokes the concept of leadership by means that you should not be a leader just based on having a specific position or title, I believe that this was an opportunity to make an authentic difference in a community that I genuinely care about.
Though many of the remnants of the previous culture were still clearly in place, our new officer squad, which included J.T. Payne and Alex Renteria, have remained part of the organization alongside myself to see its evolution come to fruition as we continue to see SMS thrive toward its full potential. But how did that transition start? We originally rebranded the organization with a new logo to reflect our revitalization of focusing on our core principles: to network, socialize, and volunteer – all of which are essential to an individual’s success in the sport industry. We, as officers, also wished to push forth a brand that represented professionalism by incorporating official officer polos and are accompanied by khakis.
We developed a strategy that incorporated bringing a new guest speaker from a different segment of the industry for every meeting each semester, to help feed to our values of networking. This would allow our members to grow accustomed to the best practices across the industry, as well as offer the chance for our members, who are often not as sure what their specific interests are, to be provided insight as to how the industry works from a myriad of perspectives. To build on that, an issue has been that we have not known what our history is as an organization, which someone got lost in the transitional years before SMS’s great upheaval into a meaningful community. Since, we have established a better foundation of alumni support that will help our members to continue to grow and develop through significant relationships that are intended to last forever. As we unlock our history, we draw closer to unlocking the full potential that is SMS, and I cannot wait to see what that looks like down the road when I am long gone.
What better way to socialize that to have opportunities mid-meeting for the members to interact and get to know one another. This could be through interactive gameplay or moments where we specifically call on one of our highlighted members to share their interests and experiences, thus inspiring a space that allows newer members to feel comfortable interacting with more individuals than just the officer team. Additionally, we would set up exchanges that allowed for people to dive into deeper conversations than just simple icebreaker activities. Together, I have learned that it is essentially that we learn about one another, share our experiences, cherish our similarities, and celebrate the opportunities to grow through learning about our differences. And – of course – my SMS family would know that we have to end every single meeting with my infamous Kahoot! Challenges, known for their extremely specific questions that you would likely do much better on if you actually just guessed without looking at the answers instead of taking the time to think. It’s fun and gets everyone involved through laughter – at the questions and at my witty remarks – with everyone brushing off the tears rolling down their faces.
As for volunteering – or serving – it has been a pleasure to help get SMS involved in the community. Not just as expected student activities like The Big Event, but I mean involved in the industry with real world experience. There is not a sport management class that I have taken that has not mentioned how incredibly vital it is for students to get out into the community and serve through volunteering, which helps provide relevant experience to us as individuals seeking a position within the sport industry. In SMS, that has manifested itself through our involvement with partnerships developed with organizations like the intercollegiate athletic organization, Conference USA. This helped propel SMS into its evolved form that exists today, as we would not be legitimate if it was not for someone providing us the opportunity to bring members to an event during spring break to gain that necessary experience – thank you Marianne Kemme for making that happen. This opportunity consisted of no funding support, carpooling, and sleepovers, but nonetheless, our members were hungry for experience and growth. As a result of our efforts, this springboarded us into fully-funded trips to working events that included the Travel, Events, and Management in Sports Conference + Expo in Anaheim, California and the College Football Playoff National Championship in New Orleans, Louisiana. Not just volunteering, but serving has helped bring our organization closer to its full potential.
It has been a pleasure to serve as an officer, to implement all of these changes, and to help make them come to life. How have I done all of this? Well, to be clear, it was never just me and it was never just about me. It was the members – the people – that made all of this happen. All I can do is attempt to lead as a servant leader for every second of every day and hope that it inspires someone to believe in what we are trying to do. I was so extremely depressed and riddled with anxiety, and all of that energy – or whatever remnants there were that remained of me – needed an outlet to grow into something beautiful. I will leave a legacy that I’m extremely proud of, but I am proud of the people that help define that logo and the brand that is The Sport Management Society. There has not been a single moment of building this organization from the ground up that has been easy, but it is not “work” if you are putting this living, breathing idea of an organization together with your friends – your family – one year, month, week, and day at a time. Regardless of the intense effort needed, I have done, still do, and will always do whatever it takes to see this become the best sport management student organization on the planet – whatever it takes.
As SMS nearly disbanded, I was falling apart. As SMS has climbed into a great community of beautiful people, I, too, have blossomed into an individual that I am proud of. Since becoming an officer, I became a first-generation college graduate and was accepted into the master’s program for sport management here at Texas A&M. My dreams of becoming Dr. Aaron Anderson are ever-present, with doctoral applications nearing completion and purposeful experiences that have allowed me to develop my research, teaching, and service skills. I love what I do and love what I have become. If I were to suggest something, it would be that you should find something that you love and give your entire heart and soul to it. Even if you are dealing with depression, struggling with anxiety, overcoming a sexual assault, battling addiction, coming to terms with the traumatic experiences of domestic violence, there is a safe space for you in a family like SMS. Regardless of my horrible experiences, SMS gave me the space to be the best version of me that I could be without judgement. The Sport Management Society saved my life.
To all of the SMS family, old and new, to the future and the past, to the people I never met and to whom I will never meet, this piece is for you.
-- Aaron Anderson
Aaron is a Master's student is the Department of Health and Kinesiology
October 2018 was the worst month of my life. I look back and I still remember the collision of my personal life, work life, and academic life spreading my broken spirit so thin that it seemed that I was in an impossible situation with no way out. The quicksand, the whitewater rapids, the resistant force that is depression and anxiety began to make it hard to find a will to keep fighting. No matter how exhausted I was, I could not go to sleep. Regardless of how hungry I was, there were so many days I could not eat. The imposter syndrome derived from being a first-generation college student from a low-income, single-mother home that had to fight through the Blinn TEAM Program just to feel like I belonged. It seemed like there was no escape.
Exiting an extremely toxic relationship seems like a positive – which it is – but at that moment in time, realizing that I had spent a great portion of my life pouring my energy into someone that only provided toxic habits and traits in return was shameful. The time and energy that could have been economically organized to my family, friends, and the people in my life that loved me reminded me of the true opportunity cost of my situation. Cohabiting with someone who actively impedes on your life and mental health is detrimental – it makes you not want to go home, the place that is supposed to be your sacred escape from any problems.
After having the chance to put together the marketing campaigns for the 2017 Sport Management Career Fair and the inaugural Able, Active, and Adaptive Disability Conference, I was hired as a student worker within the TAMU Sport Management program to execute the social media campaign. What I was not prepared for was the toxic work environment that my supervisor at the time would unload onto me by being manipulative and taking advantage of my “catch-22” habit of saying yes to every opportunity. As a student worker, I was only being paid for 10 hours a week to run the accounts yet I was working 30+ hours as I helped put together a lesson plan for a Sport Communication course that I was not a instructor or teaching assistant for, on top of being forced into a position to lead several events, and being scolded for not being able to fulfill so many unrealistic expectations. The philosophical differences between my supervisor and myself was that they saw individuals as expendable – as exhaustible – but to me, every single person offers something new to a culture, offers new skills to a workplace, and offers a collection of unique experiences that no one can bring to the table.
Of course, with the aforementioned dilemmas in place, my education – my main priority – began to suffer. My professors were able to quickly figure that something was wrong with me. Why would Aaron not be actively participating in class? As Dr. Andrew Pittman would know, I always have something to add to the discussion in class. It was clear that my passion for being an active student in the classroom was put into question, and it was no longer – quite simply put – fun. At this point in time, I had made the decision to pursue graduate school and become Dr. Aaron Anderson, professor of sport management, but my enthusiasm for pursuing this was muddled with hating my overextended work and not being able to enjoy going home at the end of the day. Dr. Scott Waltemyer’s office seemed like it was my only escape from everything going wrong at home, at work, and in school.
The few members that still believed in the organization’s potential will remember that one fateful night that was likely the lowest point of the organization. It was a cold night and – at the time – the organization would meet on the third floor of Blocker, an inherently inconvenient place for meetings to occur relative to so many other organizations. Imagine taking the time and energy to go out of your way on campus and come to a meeting where: 1) Two of the seven-member officer team show up; 2) There are no new opportunities or social activities provided; 3) The presentation lasts only five minutes; and 4) There are no opportunities for members to socialize in substitution of meaningful presentation time. I believe that that night essentially sealed the fate of the organization to ultimately disband, much like another TAMU student organization: the Sport Marketing Association.
There was a clear disinterest shared among the few remaining people that were active in the organization at that very moment. The organization was officially a joke to its members and that specific meeting was the punchline. After that night, maybe 15 members stayed involved with the organization and justifiably so – why would anyone want to stay involved with anything that they paid to be part of if there are no inherent benefits? For many, this was the breaking point that lost so many people and the SMS brand equity was lost within the sport management student body and among the faculty members. For others, this was a call to action – a call for some substantial change given the obvious potential for this organization to be successful. Cue the officer applications.
Though many of the remnants of the previous culture were still clearly in place, our new officer squad, which included J.T. Payne and Alex Renteria, have remained part of the organization alongside myself to see its evolution come to fruition as we continue to see SMS thrive toward its full potential. But how did that transition start? We originally rebranded the organization with a new logo to reflect our revitalization of focusing on our core principles: to network, socialize, and volunteer – all of which are essential to an individual’s success in the sport industry. We, as officers, also wished to push forth a brand that represented professionalism by incorporating official officer polos and are accompanied by khakis.
We developed a strategy that incorporated bringing a new guest speaker from a different segment of the industry for every meeting each semester, to help feed to our values of networking. This would allow our members to grow accustomed to the best practices across the industry, as well as offer the chance for our members, who are often not as sure what their specific interests are, to be provided insight as to how the industry works from a myriad of perspectives. To build on that, an issue has been that we have not known what our history is as an organization, which someone got lost in the transitional years before SMS’s great upheaval into a meaningful community. Since, we have established a better foundation of alumni support that will help our members to continue to grow and develop through significant relationships that are intended to last forever. As we unlock our history, we draw closer to unlocking the full potential that is SMS, and I cannot wait to see what that looks like down the road when I am long gone.
What better way to socialize that to have opportunities mid-meeting for the members to interact and get to know one another. This could be through interactive gameplay or moments where we specifically call on one of our highlighted members to share their interests and experiences, thus inspiring a space that allows newer members to feel comfortable interacting with more individuals than just the officer team. Additionally, we would set up exchanges that allowed for people to dive into deeper conversations than just simple icebreaker activities. Together, I have learned that it is essentially that we learn about one another, share our experiences, cherish our similarities, and celebrate the opportunities to grow through learning about our differences. And – of course – my SMS family would know that we have to end every single meeting with my infamous Kahoot! Challenges, known for their extremely specific questions that you would likely do much better on if you actually just guessed without looking at the answers instead of taking the time to think. It’s fun and gets everyone involved through laughter – at the questions and at my witty remarks – with everyone brushing off the tears rolling down their faces.
As for volunteering – or serving – it has been a pleasure to help get SMS involved in the community. Not just as expected student activities like The Big Event, but I mean involved in the industry with real world experience. There is not a sport management class that I have taken that has not mentioned how incredibly vital it is for students to get out into the community and serve through volunteering, which helps provide relevant experience to us as individuals seeking a position within the sport industry. In SMS, that has manifested itself through our involvement with partnerships developed with organizations like the intercollegiate athletic organization, Conference USA. This helped propel SMS into its evolved form that exists today, as we would not be legitimate if it was not for someone providing us the opportunity to bring members to an event during spring break to gain that necessary experience – thank you Marianne Kemme for making that happen. This opportunity consisted of no funding support, carpooling, and sleepovers, but nonetheless, our members were hungry for experience and growth. As a result of our efforts, this springboarded us into fully-funded trips to working events that included the Travel, Events, and Management in Sports Conference + Expo in Anaheim, California and the College Football Playoff National Championship in New Orleans, Louisiana. Not just volunteering, but serving has helped bring our organization closer to its full potential.
As SMS nearly disbanded, I was falling apart. As SMS has climbed into a great community of beautiful people, I, too, have blossomed into an individual that I am proud of. Since becoming an officer, I became a first-generation college graduate and was accepted into the master’s program for sport management here at Texas A&M. My dreams of becoming Dr. Aaron Anderson are ever-present, with doctoral applications nearing completion and purposeful experiences that have allowed me to develop my research, teaching, and service skills. I love what I do and love what I have become. If I were to suggest something, it would be that you should find something that you love and give your entire heart and soul to it. Even if you are dealing with depression, struggling with anxiety, overcoming a sexual assault, battling addiction, coming to terms with the traumatic experiences of domestic violence, there is a safe space for you in a family like SMS. Regardless of my horrible experiences, SMS gave me the space to be the best version of me that I could be without judgement. The Sport Management Society saved my life.
To all of the SMS family, old and new, to the future and the past, to the people I never met and to whom I will never meet, this piece is for you.
-- Aaron Anderson
Aaron is a Master's student is the Department of Health and Kinesiology